What Are Your Self-Sabotaging Triggers?

In order to overcome our specific self-sabotaging triggers, we have to understand what triggers are, and what their purpose is in everyday life.

We’re gonna look at triggers from a big picture perspective first — very general, not specific to self-sabotage. This will make sure we understand the concept of triggers and how they’re impacting your everyday life.

Now, “Trigger” isn’t a common word, so let’s define it so that we’re all on the same page here.

What is a trigger?

A trigger is anything that causes a reaction.

There are 3 common types of triggers:

• Visual (what you see)
• Auditory (what you hear)
• Kinesthetic (what you feel)

Each of these can be broken down into either External or Internal.

For example…

Visual External

• When you see something with your eyes. For example, when you see a specific painting, building, or name. These are all visual external triggers because you’re seeing something happen in your external world (not in your mind).

Visual Internal

• When you picture something in your mind. For example, when you picture the Bahamas, remember an ex taking you out for coffee, or watch a situation unfold in your mind. These are all visual internal triggers because you’re seeing it happen in your internal world (it isn’t happening in your external world, only your mind).

Auditory External

• When you hear something with your ears. For example, when you hear a specific song, voice (eg. your significant other), or sound (eg. car tires screeching). These are all auditory external triggers because you’re hearing something happen in your external world (not in your mind).

Auditory Internal

• When you hear something in your mind. For example, remembering your boss say, “Great job!”, remembering the disappointment in your history teachers’ voice, or hearing a voice in your head say, “I can’t do it — I should give up now.” These are all examples of auditory internal triggers because you’re hearing it happen in your internal world (it isn’t happening in your external world, only your mind).

Kinesthetic External

• When you feel something physically (not emotionally). For example, the feeling of walking on a hardwood floor (the texture), the feeling of hair brushing against your arm or hand, or even the feeling of someone’s touch. These are all examples of kinesthetic external triggers because you’re feeling something happen in the external world (your physical world).

Kinesthetic Internal

• When you feel something emotionally (not physically. Another way to look at it is how you feel about something (emotionally). For example, feeling anxious about seeing something, stressed out about a conversation you have to have, or on edge about an upcoming performance review. These are all examples of kinesthetic internal triggers because you’re feeling something happen in your internal world (your emotional world). They involve emotions and not external physical events.

You may have noticed that one trigger can trigger other triggers.

For example, you walk into a local coffee shop, and you see a specific painting on the wall (visual external trigger).

All of a sudden, in your mind you hear your ex say, “Look at that composition! That’s a beautiful painting!” (auditory internal trigger).

This floods you with emotions. You feel sad because you miss going to local coffee shops with someone, happy because the relationship was toxic and you’re glad it’s over, and relieved because you always hated your ex’s taste in paintings (all kinesthetic internal triggers).

You clear your mind and sit down, waiting for your date. After they arrive, you stand up and give them a hug (kinesthetic external trigger). The physical touch makes you feel relaxed (kinesthetic internal trigger), but the hug seems to last a little too long (kinesthetic external trigger) and you start to feel uncomfortable (kinesthetic internal trigger).

Do you see how one trigger can lead to another trigger?